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In the self-help program, we first thought about travel and the holidays as events requiring special efforts, but over time we realized that any non-routine event could be made more manageable by using the same three strategies:
1) Rest, Rest, Rest
2) Plan in Detail
3) Discuss Plans with Others
A person bedbound with CFS used these three techniques to handle a ten-day visit from her daughter and seven year old granddaughter. She was motivated to try something different because past visits had led to relapses that lasted several months.
She prepared for the visit by reducing her usual activities prior to the visit and using the time for extra rest.
She created a plan to alternate days of socializing with days of quiet rest, and explained her plan to her daughter, who accepted it. She spent time with her granddaughter every other day, but in a quiet way that did not overwhelm her.
After her visitors left, she spent two days resting.
The result: no setback but rather a sense of triumph. Instead of a family visit leading to a months-long relapse, it was an experience of control through pacing.
About her time with her granddaughter, she said, “I had never even come close to surviving a visit from my granddaughter since developing CFS/FMS. It absolutely thrilled me that we were able to make some special memories together without it being damaging for me.”
She has used the same strategies to manage other visits by her daughter and granddaughter, including a much longer visit that occurred almost three years after the initial success. |